He appeared in my dreams.
The moment I saw him, I knew I was dreaming. I told myself, "Do not wake up! Focus on a detail, and hold on."
I focused on his eyes.
His loving eyes, looked right in to mine.
He was standing in the outdoor hallway of my childhood school. Aren't dreams like that... taking us to places in our past for a reason we do not understand. I thought about my childhood school searching for the symbolism it might bring to my dream. Childhood School = A Beginning Place of Knowledge... gained wisdom; That symbolism held truth for me.
He was as I remember him: In his wrangler jeans, a plaid, button-down shirt and his sideways grin. He looked younger by ten years or so, his white hair thicker then. He was my dad.. every cell vibrant, real and alive.
I walked up to him, and consciously aware that I was dreaming, told myself to feel, to breath, to take every ounce of this moment in... to let it become me. I remember thinking in my dream: This is the moment you have been waiting for, to see him in your dreams, stay focused. I knew that we would embrace, I knew I would feel my dad's arms around me and I told myself, "You will not wake up, you will be present within your dream...open your senses to this moment." and miraculously I did.
I said, "Hi Dad," then we embraced. I felt his body, sensed him, smelled him, it was his healed body, and I was awed by the feeling of realness. I soaked it in as pure gift.
I asked him how he was? What was it like...
He smiled, and said he was happy, that it was good, that all was well.
I told him I was glad for that.
We never stopped looking into each other's eyes. I told him he looked good, alive... well. He nodded, "I am."
I tried not to cry. I was so very happy.
Leaning in I asked him, "Is there anything I should know? Is there anything I should be doing?"
He said,"Pray for our country, it needs prayer to stay on track." I told him I would; He repeated, "Pray, prayer brings guidance."
Then we hugged tightly, I felt his strong gentle hands on my back, and he kissed my cheek. He felt warm.
I remember feeling my dream starting to move without me. I saw my body turn towards the door in the school hallway. I knew that if I turned my dream would change. I turned towards the door, and as my hand touched the door handle I knew my dad was no longer behind me. I turned around and he was gone.
Dreams. They are worth the wait.
I woke up and the world looked differently.
We are not alone. Even when we doubt that truth. Even when there is nothing around to show us the way, or even lend us a hand... we are not alone.